I am currently exploring the process of coping with the feeling of being abandoned by those who have come and gone in my life. With my mental illness clouding my experiences, my work is impulsive and intuitive by abstracting emotion onto surface.
The words from the present and past represent the two interacting together, and bridges the gap between the emotion I am having to the thought. I let the piece have a conversation with me. I will often switch pieces in the middle of a session, flip it, or completely paint over work I feel are not honest. Honesty with myself and the viewer is very important to this body of work, since my work comes from such an subconscious, interior landscape.
These paintings show the process of apologizing for your minor mistakes and not being heard or forgiven, being caught in the cycle of coping with abandonment — regardless if they have left or not, and wondering what it’s like to be freed from the cycles of mental illness. They are emotions frozen in time, yet breathing and moving at the same time.